From BGR:The Reluctant Runner: (Volume 1) Lesson #1- Get off the Couch and Into Your New Life

The Reluctant Runner:  (Volume 1)  Lesson #1- Get off the Couch and Into Your New Life

December 29, 2011
Reposted from Black Girls Run

By Franchesca Lane-Warren

I am currently in a love/hate relationship. We argue, we fight, I even cheat a little bit on my significant other but today I am going to “lay it all on the table” and hope we can get over this dysfunctional relationship I have with running. Nine months ago, I decided to lace up my old running shoes and hit the pavement (walking at first) so that I could be in better health. At first it was easy..I would go out and walk for about 30 minutes and I would feel accomplished. However when I decided to start a relationship with running it all changed.

You see I wanted to run..heck I needed to run. I was 225lbs and I felt trapped in my own body. I could not fit any of my clothes, I got winded quickly and I was sure that I would continue to gain unless I took drastic steps—fast. I decided I would run but I just could not MAKE myself get out of my house that first time running.

I got dressed, pulled my hair back but my feet were paralyzed from actually leaving my house and running. At first, I thought about all the reasons I could NOT run (it was too hard on my knees, I was too out of shape, black women don’t run). After realizing how stupid I sounded I made my way to the door to open it. Another terrifying thought came to my mind, “what if people laughed at me running?” Wow. That was a thought that nearly made me crawl back in bed and try again the next day.

I sat down and collected my thoughts. Without thinking any further, I bolted out the door to my first Black Girls Run! Atlanta neighborhood run. As I pulled up, I noticed that there were all types of women (big, small, short, skinny) stretching and getting ready to run. As I approached the group, I was welcomed by smiles so my nerves got better. I was going to run—reluctantly.

I finished the 3 mile run but I can’t lie…there were several times I wanted to literally run (and hide) until everyone went home and I could walk back to my car and never come back. But I didn’t. I kept going through the pain, through the discouraging thoughts and I finished. As I look back at that moment, I can now laugh (since I really am a runner now) but I also learned some important lessons about just getting out and hitting the pavement—even when you do NOT want to.

Me in 2010

1. The longer you think about running, the longer you will NOT do it. Going to my first run (and all of my subsequent runs after) I realized that if I just did it I was more likely to RUN.  Now when I have doubts about running, I just quickly put on my clothes and just bolt out the house and think about it later.

2. That even though I am in a love/hate relationship with running every time I RUN I feel better (mentally and physically). Whenever I have had a bad day, I hit the pavement and the negativity is left on the pavement.

3. Running allows me push myself physically. After completing that first run I felt empowered, NOTHING could stop me—even myself. Nine months ago I was overweight and because of me getting off the couch and running I was able to not only shed 32 pounds but shed the self doubt that was in my head .

I recognize that there are other reluctant runners reading this that need a ten step program to reform their dysfunctional relationship with running. What is your relationship with running? Are you reluctant to run or are you a running machine?

Tune in next week as I discuss how a reluctant runner finds the courage to register for organized races.

Fran is the owner and head writer of lifestyle blog, www.bossygirl1980.com and lifewiththreekids.wordpress.com. You can find her on twitter @Bossygirl1980 reliving the good, bad and strange world of parenting.

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Product Review: Wet n Wild Eyeshadow Palette

I have spent a lot of money on make-up from big brands to drugstore finds in a pinch. Over the past few years I have gone through several changes with my make-up. I went from never leaving the house without any to wearing none. Like many African-American females I found confidence with my big chop back in 2009. I was okay with a bit of moisturizer and lip balm. I began looking at my skin differently and stopped using harsh soaps and went for a more natural route like shea butter, natural scrubs, homemade toner, and black soap…needless to say my face has rarely broken out and my complexion has never been better.

However, recently I have gotten back into the make up game and I have been using my old stash. Of course, I went to the expensive brands first but at the end of the day my face was JACKED!! So I started to mix things up and play with my collection and I have settled on what works for me. This mix is a combo of drug store brands and Trader Joe’s facial moisturizer…LOVE TJs! Seriously, the moisturizer is less than $4 and last all day and is not greasy at all…LOVE IT!!

The Review

For anyone that uses eyeshadow knows that it can be a mess with creasing and just plain disappearing. However I have found the best concentration and staying power in Wet n Wild eyeshadow. This will stay on all day. I put it in the morning and I am rocking it all day. There is no creasing, no loss of color, and no damage to my bank account after buying it as the palette above is under $5. I go from work to after work events and meetings without having to touch up at all. If you are looking for new eyeshadow for whatever reason I suggest giving Wet n Wild a second look.

**I have received compensation in no way from this review. This is solely based on my experience alone. Product was purchased with my own money**

There May be More to Your Broken Heart Than You Think

I have been a subscriber to Marie Claire for years…you know back when the lead article actually sent the subject on assignment that covered actual important issues. Yeah, that Marie Claire I was a fan of. Now, it seems like the recycle the same five actresses that look actually alike blond, blue, tried and true. Not that I have a problem with that but I would like a little spice a little flavor…just something more diverse.

Any who, while I have been cleaning out old magazines from the past year; I ran across all the previous months issues of Marie Claire that I have been avoiding like the plague. However, in the August 2011 issue of Marie Claire I ran across a one page article that got me thinking. Seriously, I have been carrying this article around with me for over a week just to examine every word and take it all in. I knew I wanted to blog about this article because the message is just something you never hear about. I have a hard time even believing it’s real (but then again, I had a hard time swallowing He’s Just Not That Into You, too). So after carrying this around a week and after having a conversation with my bestie from another testie, my sister from another mister in from New York; I decided I am about to get incredibly real with you all when I give my opinion of this article.

Samara O'Shea

The article is titled Lovesick? You might have a Legit Illness. The article tells the story of Samara O’Shea after losing the guy she was in love with she entered an emotional dark hole that manifested itself into sadness and physical strain. She explains the feeling she felt before the end of the relationship and then the feelings she felt after the ending of it. I use the term relationship in an unconventional form because, Samara and this guy were never actually a couple. Unfortunately for her she was already in emotionally deep. The article goes into some details about her symptoms then to how she is handling it now with the help of anti-depressants and the help of a doctor who has given the name Limerance to this psychological condition. Limerance is “A man or woman suffering from limerance is in a constant state of compulsory longing for another person,” Wakin tells me over the phone. “It doesn’t matter if their affection is returned; nothing will satiate their need for emotional reciprocation.” Yep, it has a name and doctor a that specializes with the condition.

My Opinion:
Well, I tousled around with this a lot. For me this is hard because I have never been that emotionally attached to anyone. When it’s done it’s done; had always been my M.O. and I was okay with that until that one guy, the one that left me like “damn…what just happened here?”. We were not a couple. We had no commitments to each other. We were just friends. We chatted on the phone, e-mailed, and shared looks and smiles; that’s all. But, I had it bad and it came out to those close to me over many drinks and many nights of sushi, sake, and mischief with Ellen C. My friends had no idea I felt that way but I did and it still stings a little when I hear his name and like in the article my stomach drops. My stomach is a little queasy just typing this but oh well, I’m human. I think of him more than I would like too but the analytical side of me knows that I am now thinking of him in the way that I knew him then and like myself I am sure he has changed and grown as a person. I care for him still and wish nothing but the best for him. I have not crossed any lines with these feelings I have maintained my dignity and respect for myself and him. He was very angry in the end and I have respected him enough to not reach out and he has not reached out to me either. I don’t stalk him online or do anything creepy because well– that is just not me. On the other side of all this is really? Could this be real? But, I think it is. Misplaced affection on that person you can not have.

Enjoy the article and let me know what you think.

Read more: Limerance Psychological Condition – Love Sickness – Marie Claire

Five Ways to Wear a Maxi Skirt in the Winter